To quote the old Irma Thomas song, you don’t miss a good thing until it’s gone.  

It’s Monday night.  Nanette and I are just settling back on the couch to watch a bunch of ridiculously fit Olympians slug it out for medals.  As usual, I’ve just commented that “I could do that – if I was just a few years younger.”  Also as usual, Nanette has given me that “in which universe?” look.  Then, as if in response to her thought, our whole world is plunged into eerie darkness.

The power has been a bit erratic over the past couple of days, but this feels, well, different.  Time to grab the little lamp we keep for just such occasions.  Click.  Click. Click.  “Um, er, looks like we need new batteries.”  It’s pitch dark, but I can feel Nanette’s accusatory stare across the room.  Never one to quit while I’m behind, I suggest – “it’s your birthday soon.  If we light all your candles now, it’ll be bright enough to …” Well, at least one of us thought it was funny.

By the light of my trusty iPhone, I head into the garage and retrieve the store of ancient candles we keep as a backup in case our other backup – has flat batteries.  Ah – there – isn’t that cosy?  

I muse aloud about how it must have been pleasant back in the old days before electric power.  “Father would have sat beside the fire, smoking his pipe peacefully, while …”  Nanette finishes the thought for me.  “While mother sat rocking the cradle, darning socks, and reading to their fourteen children.”  

Our reflections are interrupted by flashes of bright light from the front windows.  As the man of the house, and self-professed potential former Olympian, I’m sent out to investigate.

There’s definitely action on the street.  A couple of guys in reflective vests have just emerged from a truck with the brightest work lights I’ve ever seen.  I’m considering asking them if they have any spare batteries, when I spot my neighbours, Bob and Ian, standing in the shadows.  In the great tradition of men who know nothing about what’s actually happening, we discuss the actions of the workmen.

“Must be a break in the underground line.”  “Yeah.”  “I reckon that power box he’s working on is the right one.  It’s bigger than that other one over there.”  

At this point, one of the workmen strolls over.  “Hi guys.  Looks like there’s a break in the underground line between this power box and the next one.”  We resist the temptation to comment that we had deduced this ten minutes ago.  Why shatter the young feller’s self-esteem.

“It’ll take a couple of days to fix, so we’re bringing a big generator from the depot to keep this section of the street going until it’s fixed.  The generator crew should be here in about an hour.”

An hour?  No worries.  We can handle a little challenge like another hour sitting in the dark.

“I’m gunna head to Maccas”, says Bob, “gotta feed me visitors so I’ll grab some burgers and fries.”

“Think I’ll go visit my daughter”, says Ian.

They look expectantly at me.  I think for a bit, then have a gold medal inspiration.  “I’m going to take Nanette … to Bunnings to get batteries!” 

(Editor’s note – translations for our non-Aussie friends. Maccas = MacDonalds. Bunnings = Home Depot, but better)